Nuisance Neighbors: How to Cope

Although we are supposed to love our neighbors, sometimes things get in the way, such as barking dogs, unsightly yards or smelly stoves. We will discuss some strategies for dealing with these problems, nicely.

For homeowners, annoying neighbors can strongly affect quality of life. Maybe your problem is kids who blast music or maybe it’s a smelly wood-burning stove. Whatever your issue, a recent Realty Times article has some suggestions on keeping the peace and solving the problem.

The first thing you need to decide about your annoying neighbors is whether you can cope with the problem or not. Perhaps a yard full of unraked leaves isn’t worth starting a war. But if the problem is significant enough to cause you stress or affect your health or sleep, it does need to be fixed.

Your first step toward problem resolution is communication. Try speaking with your neighbor in a polite way. Without accusing your neighbor (which will then put him or her on the defensive), explain the problem and ask for relief. The neighbor may not have noticed the issue or may not have realized it would be bothersome to others. The key to non-combative confrontation is to remain calm and friendly. The other person is likely to mirror your behavior. You should also speak to the person at a convenient time of day; in other words, don’t bang on the door in the middle of the night or intercept your neighbor as he or she is leaving for work.

A word of caution: you should only engage in a confrontation if you feel your neighbor will act reasonably. It can be frightening in today’s world to confront someone who might behave irrationally or dangerously with a problem. If you feel unsafe, you should pursue another course of action.

Another option for a nuisance like a wood-burning stove may be to offer a financial compromise. This, of course, depends on how much fixing the problem is worth to you. You could offer to pay for the neighbor to change to natural gas or offer to pay some of their gas bills for a certain period. Many civil disputes are often settled by money, so there is nothing wrong with this approach if you are not able to or do not want to take legal action.

If polite discussion is either unsuccessful or inappropriate, another option is to contact your building manager if you rent or your homeowner’s association if you own your home. These two parties can discuss the problem with the neighbor and will probably be able to keep your complaint anonymous. Homeowner’s associations typically have strict rules as to the appearance of the community’s properties, so if your problem is an aesthetic one, they may be of the most assistance. You can also check your local noise ordinances, if the problem is noise. Local officials can sometimes be of assistance if the problem is a barking dog or other disruption, and may even offer a hotline for such issues.

Legal action is another avenue available to you, but should not be undertaken lightly, due to the cost and headache involved. You can file a lawsuit claiming public or private nuisance, as well as other claims. If possible, you should hire a lawyer to help you navigate the legal system effectively. You should also be sure to have other witnesses to the problem so they can be called on to support your claim. Finally, any attempts to resolve the problem prior to legal action should be made in writing and copies made.

A last resort to a problem neighbor may be just to move. Although people hate to be chased from their homes, this may make sense for your situation, depending on the severity and the options you have exhausted.

Whether you choose peaceful discussion or legal action, remember that your choice can affect your relationship with your neighbor for as long as you are stuck with each other. Any confrontation should therefore be thought through carefully.

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